Fiddledeedee

First I must pose a question.  Why is it that all the Christmas toys are ripped open within five minutes, yet the job of freeing said toys from their prison like packaging can take half a day or more?

What kind of sick twisted individual devised packaging that is not only childproof, but also most assuredly adult proof.  Scissors will not do the job alone.  Nay.  One must also employ needle nosed pliers, bolt cutters, and dynamite to boot.

I’m writing to Mattel, and carbon copying Hasbro and Fisher Price to complain bitterly about nearly loosing two perfectly good typing fingers.

Other than that, it was a perfectly lovely Christmas morning.

Moving on.

I would now like to publicly apologize to my 4 year old nephew for the trauma he suffered when he saw the “Bambi Meets Godzilla” clip on my blog this week.

A personal note to Aunt Trish:  Anything that starts with “Bambi Meets Godzilla” IS NOT GOING TO END WELL.  It’s always best to shoo the children away before coming to this blog.  You of all people know what I’m capable of.

Aunt DeeDee

Allrightythen.  Just prior to Christmas, I took an unscientific poll to see who wanted to join me on my quest to lose a few unwanted pounds.  Because misery loves company.

And more than a few of you are also willing to also enjoy the public humiliation of locking arms with me and tempting that ugly entity called will power.

I am ever so grateful.  I never would want to enter that battle alone.

I will be doing the South Beach eating plan.  And notice that I did not use the word d-i-e-t.  Because that’s a 4 letter word that I chose not to use.  This being a family friendly blog and all.

I’m simply on a quest to be healthier.  And in the process, hopefully find my will power again.

And my waistline.

Also.  THIS IS NOT A NEW YEARS RESOLUTION.  If I were to call it that, I would fail.  It just happens to all around the first part of the year, by happy coincidence.

Whatever.

Pssst, I actually started on Monday.  I didn’t really intend to, but I ate a foot long chili cheese dog courtesy of Sonic on Sunday night and I knew right then and there that I’d hit a very hard wall.

And double-pssst, I’m at the end of day 2 and am doing just fine.  No one in my house has been injured.  Or worse.  I even went to Carrabbas last night and ate CARB FREE!  No bread or croutons.  That is some sort of end of the year Carrabbas miracle.

Anyhoo, I’ll put up Mr. Linky on Friday, January 9th, and I invite you all to talk about your goals, fears, tips, recipes, or thoughts in your own post.  If you’ve chosen to accept this mission.

You don’t have to follow South Beach, some of you love Weight Watchers, or are in the “Zone”, etc.  Whatever is the healthiest choice for you.

And you don’t have to have a blog to participate.  The comments section would work just fine!

Now I’m going to take the rest of the week off to mentally prepare myself for the start of school next week.  I’ll be reposting some memorable moments from 2008.

And lastly, thank you to all of you for a really great blogging year.  I am so very blessed to know that I don’t struggle alone.  Thank you for supporting me, and for your wonderful blogs and comments.  My heart is full.

Have a wonderfully blessed New Year!

One of my favorite all time shorts, is a little piece of cinematic excellence titled “Bambi Meets Godzilla.” I laugh every single time I view it. I have for years.

Evidently, I possess a refined sense of humor.

And now, thanks to You Tube, I can view it ad nauseum. And I’m happy to share it with you.

Your welcome.

On Christmas eve, Fiddledaddy and I were inspired to stage a little Godzilla type revenge on my Christmas village. Blame it on the Christmas spirit. Or the egg nog.

Whatever.

The next morning, Dinosaur (one of Jensen’s most favorite toys) was discovered, red handed. The children were given strict instructions not to touch the Christmas village this year. They were told that should a stray Die Cast car, or Polly Pocket appear within the village, the penalty would be certain and swift death.

The resident narc in the family wasted no time in alerting us to the infraction of “Diny-Sore’s” appearance within the Christmas village.

“Jensen didn’t do it.”

“But who did?”

“Daddy and I were having a little fun.”

Stunned silence.

“Why?”

“Because it’s Christmas. The parents are allowed to have fun every now and again. Right?”

What followed was a slight shake of the head in disbelief, as if to say “Grow up already, Mom.”

Wait until she discovers what awaits her in her stocking.

Parents must find their fun wherever possible.

I’m posting over at 5 Minutes for Parenting today. The subject matter is fire and brimstone. But more fire than brimstone. Anyhoo. It’s hot. Sssssssss.

Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, the Rum Balls were made, the mommy was soused.

The stockings were flung to the floor with no care,
in hopes that a maid, soon would be there.

I felt not like cooking, see my sad bunioned feet,
So to Sonic we flew, so we could all eat.

A foot long chili dog, some onion rings to boot
I knew then and there, they’d give me the scoots.

Dash away home, Fiddledaddy, fly like the wind,
Cut off all those cars, an apology I’ll send.

At last we are home, Pepto Bismol in hand,
I tuck in the children, before the floor will I land.

The begged and they pleaded, just a few minutes more,
“No way,” did I mutter, as I fast close the door.

I settle in my room, my computer I hold,
I’m exhausted, and spent, I type in all bold.

When out in the kitchen, there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my hotpad, to see what was the matter.

Rum Balls were scattered, my gasp made him jump,
Fiddledaddy looked guilty, I helped him clean up.

The house is now quiet, the parents are pooped,
We set up the clocks, the children were duped.

We look at each other, it all seems just right, I sigh as I say,

“Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night.”

(Originally published December, 2007. The scenario is the same, only the date has changed. Merry Christmas my bloggy friends. May God bless and keep you all safe. I’ll be back on Monday!)

After spending nearly 6 days at Disney World, and walking 794 miles, you would think that I’d have lost a little weight.

BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG!

Because Disney World serves Churros, my friends. Little carts line Main Street, and kindly vendors will hand you one of these long fried morsels of deliciousness covered in cinnamon and sugar.

AND GET THIS! All you have to do is hand over money to receive one. Or 27.

So now my stretchypants are feeling a little snug. And my willpower has not only left the building, but the country as well.

And you know what that means.

It’s time to go back on South Beach. Phase 1. Since Phase 16 doesn’t seem to be working for me.

I’ve written about the South Beach diet before. In between child #2 and #3 I lost quite a bit of weight. But after packing on 50 plus pounds with Junior, and still carrying around a bit of baby weight (the baby is almost 4), it’s time to do it again.

I started Phase 1 last summer with great success, at about the time Jensen was diagnosed with severe food allergies. And after the diagnosis, I started eating everything rice and potato based right along with him.

But look! It seems that Rice and Potatoes are a carb! And carbs in massive quantities are not my friend.

Because I like to garner sympathy be transparent, I will document my weight struggles on this blog. But I wanted to get a consensus.

Who wants to do it with me?

C’mon, it’ll be fun!

If enough of you are game, I’ll do a little Mr. Linky thing on Fridays so you can share your failures, success, recipes, tips, or extreme displeasure that I even suggested this in the first place.

Of course we should weight wait until after the first of the year because that’s what everyone does. Resolutions. Whatever.

Let me know if you’re in. And if you’ve ever lost weight on The South Beach Diet.

And if you’re worried, it was written by a REAL doctor, it is a healthy lifestyle of eating, AND the recipes are wonderful. (You can check the cookbooks out at your local library.)

AND it does allow chocolate in Phase 2, which follows Phase 1 (2 weeks). Caffeine is allowed in all Phases. Otherwise, I would have chucked the whole thing out of the window.

Have I sold you on this yet?